Getting back out and dating after a long term relationship or marriage can be difficult. Especially when there is a child or children involved. What makes it so rough is that you have to find someone not only who is willing to accept you, but a person who is willing to accept you and your children. Acceptance encompasses respect…..yes respect, and sometimes that is hard to find in a person. It’s already bad enough that when you get back out in the dating pool you have to worry about diseases, baby momma/baby daddy drama, terrible habits, living conditions, metal stability of other person, financial standing, and so much more………..(I don’t need to get into the so much more……you already know) but you have to then weed through all of that and still find a positive role model for your child within that person. Not a replacement!!!!!…………Let me take this pause to insert an infomercial…….Ladies and Sirs if there is an active parent involved in the child(rens) life please do not replace…. just add to. Adding to means that daddy should have support from step dad and a clear understanding of his role and vice versa via moms. Understand that no parent is perfect and mistakes can and will be made. But there is NO REPLACEMENT of an active parent………..ok end of informational rant brought to you by Allegheny County Family Division mediation dept.
Please…..Please understand that the person you are looking to get into a relationship with needs to be patient and understanding of your parenting and role of your children are #1 in spot in your life. The relationship doesn’t come first……parenting does. Your children will always be your children rather that relationship works out or not. Relationships can be temporary but your infant will grow to be your child, your child will grow to be your teen, your teen will grow to be your needy dependent and so forth.
So to sum this all up………….Please be cautious stepping back out into the dating lane not to put your single and emotional needs first over your needs of finding compatibility within a person who understands your role as a parent and who understands the importance of coming into a situation that trust, respect and comfort should be earned in order to be within the world of you and your children.